Indlela yokufuthekisa umlingiswa: isikhokelo sokwenza isenzo, iingcebiso kunye nemizekelo

Igama elithi "impawu" livela kwimvelaphi yesiGrike. Emva kokuba ithetha itampamp ukuze ibe nomfanekiso wecandelo lomlawuli ngeengqekembe. Intsingiselo yakhe yokuqala yayinxulumene neempawu zobunkokeli, ngokungathandabuzeki ukuba wayenkosi: ukunyaniseka, ukunyaniseka, isibindi, ukuzinikezela nokunyaniseka emsebenzini.

Namhlanje, eli gama libhekiselele kumgangatho wobuntu bomntu. Ngokutsho kweengcali zengqondo, zixhomekeka kakhulu kwizimpawu kunye nobuchule.

Umlingiswa ubeka ebuntwaneni, kwaye ubomi bonke bubunjwe ... Ngaba oku kuthetha ukuba sinako ukukuphazamisa ngaphandle kokuzama ukuthethelela ubuthathaka bethu kwaye sinqwenela ngeemvelo zendalo? Kodwa kuthekani ngemfundo? Ngaba abazali banokuchaphazela uhlobo lomntwana? Le mibuzo neminye ehlobene nayo iya kuphendulwa yinqaku lethu. Ukususela kuyo uya kufunda indlela yokuthukuthela umlingani, ukwakha ezo zimpawu ongeke uzilahle nje kuphela ukwesaba, ukungaphumeleli kunye nobuthathaka, kodwa utshintshe i-destiny yakho ibe ngcono.

Ngubani obizwa ngokuba ngumntu obuthathaka?

Lo mbandela ufuna ukuqwalaselwa kuqala. Umntu onobungozi obuthakathaka ngokukhawuleza unamathela kwizilingo, akhokelwa yimpembelelo kunye nentukuthelo, kwaye ukwesaba okuninzi kunokubangela ukuba acindezeleke kunye nokungazinzi.

Akulula kumntu obuthathaka ukukhusela umbono wakhe, kulula ukuba asebenze. Loo mntu akanakwenzeka ukuba abe yinkokeli, kodwa nangona unenhlanhla kulokhu, abaphantsi kwakhe baya kuphazamisa ihlazo njengoko bayithandayo.

Ukuba ubona kuwe okanye umntwana okhulayo ezi zinto zikhohlakeleyo, ukuphelelwa lithemba akuyimfuneko. Ndikholelwe, ukuzibhokoxa kwaye ulungise ukukhuliswa kwakho kusoloko kuvelisa iziqhamo. Usenalo ithuba lokuthukuthela umlingisi oqinileyo.

Nguwuphi umandla wesimo?

Kukho iimpawu eziphambili ezivumela umntu ukuba alawule izilwanyana kunye nokuthanda, xhathisa izilingo kunye nezilingo.

Siza kuhlolisisa ngokubanzi, kwaye uhlalutyo luya kunceda ukufumana iimpendulo kumbuzo wendlela yokufutheka ngayo umlingiswa. Uya kufumana umphumo oyifunayo ukuba usebenze ekuphuhliseni nganye yale mpawu.

Ukungqubuzana kunye nokuthanda

UAristotle wabhala malunga nemibutho eyisixhenxe eyayihlala ngaphakathi kwindoda. Wabathetha oku kulandelayo kubo:

• Uthando;
• Uthiya;
• Umnqweno ongenakuphikiswa;
• Uloyiko;
• Uvuyo olungapheliyo;
• Intukuthelo;
• Ukudimazeka.

Ewe, sivakalelwa ezi zihlandlo kangangeentsuku, kodwa asifanele sizivumele ukuba zilawulwe izenzo zethu kwaye zichaphazele ukuthatha izigqibo. Ngaphandle koko, bafuna ukugqilaza ukuthanda, ukuchoboza, ukuthatha zonke iingcamango. Umntu onomlingisi onobuhlungu, akahambi kwimeko yezinto ezithandayo, eli liqela lobuthathaka.

Ungavumi ukuba nantoni na ithintele kuwe ngaphandle kokuqonda. Ngokuqinisekileyo, bonke abantu abaphilileyo bahlala bexhala, ikakhulukazi kwimeko enzima. Kodwa enye into ukubonisa iimvakalelo (lo ngumntu oqinileyo kwaye ungesabi), kwaye ngokufanayo - ukuzinikela emandleni abo.

Unokumelana njani nempembelelo enganangqiqo? Qeqesha kuwe ukuba ukwazi ukujonga ngeso nasiphi na imeko. Ngaphambi kokuba wenze isigqibo ngokunyanisekileyo uzibuze kwaye uphendule ngokunyanisekileyo, yintoni eyenza ukuba wenze ukhetho: iinjongo okanye iinjongo zentliziyo ephazamisekileyo?

Beka iinjongo ezifanelekileyo

Ngamanye amaxesha ubomi bubutyekisa umlingiswa. Kwiimeko eziyinkimbinkimbi, iimpawu zomntu zihlala zibonakaliswa, apho yena ngokwakhe engazange azi. Nangona kunjalo, oku akuthethi ukuba ufanele uzame ukuziphosa ngokwakho xa udibanisa wedwa, umhlobo okanye utshaba. Indalo yokudala yenkalo enzima, ekuya ku funeka iyanqotshwa ngokugqithiseleyo, ngokuqhelekileyo ibonakala ngathi i-posturing, kunokuba iguqulwe umlingiswa.

Ungazami ukungena enkingeni, nokuba uqinisekile ukuba uya kuba ngumnqobi. Ebomi kukho ubunzima obaneleyo. Jonga ngeenxa zonke - kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo ubone umntu ofuna i-shoulder eqinile.

Zama ukuya kwindawo

Umnini wesicatshulwa esifudumele uhlala efuna inyaniso, imbangela yesimo kunye nesimo. Ingakumbi ukuba imeko ibandakanya abantu abaninzi. Mhlawumbi uvile ilizwi lokuba wonke umntu unenyaniso yakhe, kwaye inyaniso kuphela. Mamela inguqulo yecala ngalinye. Musa ukulingwa, ngaphandle kokuqonda, kwicala kunye nomntu othandekayo kuwe kwaye ubumnandi. Ewe, ngamanye amaxesha akulula, kodwa akusikho nto abayithethayo ukuba ubunzima bubuhlungu umlingisi. Le yindlela ephela yokuhlala ecaleni lezinto ezilungileyo. Ukukhusela okungahambiyo, uya kumenza udibaniso.

Isisombululo salo nawuphi na umbuzo unokufunyanwa, ukuphepha ukucwiliswa kwiingxabano, ukuxhatshazwa, ukuqikelela, iingxolo, iimvakalelo kunye neengxabano.

Nika amaninzi

Ndixelele, indlela yokucaphukisa umlingani, ukuqiniseka ukuba yonke into eyenzeka kwangaphambili isetyenziswe ngaphambili? Kwaye kutheni usebenze ngokwakho, ukuba ungabhala nantoni na kwiindlela zokugqibela?

Umntu onomntu oqinileyo akazizibeki njengomntu onzima okanye onethemba. Akakhonanga malunga neemeko, kodwa akenzi ngokukholelwa ekubeni yonke into iya kusebenza ngendlela engcono.

Ukukholelwa kwizinto ezilungileyo kuyadingeka, kodwa akunakwenzeka ukuba ahlawule umthwalo wemfanelo kuyo yonke into eyenzekayo. Qaphela ukuba yonke into ebomini yakho ixhomekeke kuwe kuphela: iimeko zenziwe ngokuchanekileyo ngenxa yezenzo zakho (okanye, ngokuchaseneyo, ukungasebenzi).

Yazisa oko unakho

Ngokuqhelekileyo siva: "Kulungile apho singekho khona!" Ngaba umntu onamandla, onamandla onamandla unokuba njalo? Unokwazi njani ukuba kwenzekani kwenye indawo ekude? Ngokukhawuleza kukho abantu abaneengcamango ezifanayo?

Ukuba uthatha isigqibo sokuqalisa indlela yokuziphucula ngokwabo kwaye ufuna ukufunda indlela yokuthukuthela umlingani, funda ukuba ungaze umona umntu. Uyakhumbula ukuba ngubani ojongene nazo zonke iziganeko ebomini bakho? Konke kusezandleni zakho! Gxininisa oko kufuneka kwenziwe ukwenzela ukufezekisa impumelelo, kungekhona ngokulangazelela iinzuzo ezingenakufikeleleka.

Qinisekisa

Enye yeempawu eziphambili zobuntu obuthathaka, obunobuthakathaka, ukungakwazi ukuthi cha. Ukuba unenkathazo ukuze ulahlekelwe ishishini elingenalo umdla kuwe, zithintele ukuthetha nabantu abangathandekiyo, oku kuyafuneka balwe. Ungavumi ukuba umntu akhuphe into ethile enokubhikisha kuyo.

Iingcali zengqondo zikholelwa ukuba le mzuzu ingabonakala ingabalulekanga. Enyanisweni, akulula ukufunda ukufunda. Makukukhathaze ukuba akuyiyo yonke into eya kuphuma ngokukhawuleza.

Ewe, ukukwazi ukuthetha kubalulekile. Qalisa uhambo olude uphupha ngalo. Ekugqibeleni, cela ukunyuka kunye nokukhangela. Qinisekisa kwingxoxo enzulu kunye nomthandayo.

Ngaba kunzima? Kakhulu. Kodwa ungaqala ngokulula - funda ukunyaniseka nawe. Khumbula: ngaphandle kokufaka ingozi, awuyi kuvuyela uvuyo loloyisa!

Yiba nomdla kwiimbono zabanye, kodwa ungabalandeli

Lowo uthi makangenomdla kwimbono yomntu, ngeendlela ezininzi ezinganakuzikhusela. Kwihlabathi lanamhlanje, akunakwenzeka ukuba uphile ngaphandle koluntu. Kodwa umntu onomdla onamandla kufuneka akwazi ukwahlula ingqolowa kumququ.

Xa usenza izigqibo, kufuneka ucinge ukuba iziphumo nganye ziya kuba nazo. Ngaba akukho mntu ophazamise amazwi akho? Awuchaphazeli umphumo wezenzo zabanye?

Xa uvavanya oku, zama ukuba nenjongo. Ukugatya ukuzalisekisa iphupha kuphela ngenxa yokuba umntu ovela ngaphandle angenakuyithanda, ayiyonto. Ubandlululo lwabanye abantu alufanele luphazamise injongo. Ewe, ukuba uqinisekile ukuba wenza into efanelekileyo.

Hlonipha inhlonipho: musa ukubeka intando yakho kwabanye.

Funda ukwenza okulungileyo

Ngokuqinisekileyo ngamnye umzali ucinga ngendlela yokufuthekisa uhlobo lomntwana. Kule meko akukho ndlela engcono kunomzekelo ngamnye. Amakhulu eemfundiso zakho kunye neentshumayelo ezihamba phambili ziya kutshabalaliswa, ukuba kunye nentombi yakho okanye unyana uya kuhlazisa ababuthathaka kwaye ubonise ukungabi nandaba kwabangenamntu.

Kubonakala ngathi ububele abukwenzi nento yamandla. Kodwa khawucinge nje, ngamehlo abonwa ngabantwana, xa sinceda kwaye sisindisa!

Umntwana, owakhuliswa ngumkhuseli womzali, umzali-mncedisi, uya kuqiniseka ukuba okulungileyo kukubonakaliswa kwamandla okwenene omlingiswa.

Yazi indlela yokuziva ngayo

Kubalulekile kungekuphela nje indlela yokuthukuthela umlingiswa, kodwa nendlela yokugcina intliziyo entle. Ukukwazi ukuvuya kwabanye abantu ukunqoba, ngaphandle kokunyaniseka ukwabelana ngesimo somntu, ukuxhaswa ngexesha loxanduva - ezi zibonakaliso zobuntu obuqinileyo. Zithobele ngokwakho umona kunye nobugwenxa, gxotha ezi zinto zithandeke kuphela kubabuthathaka!

Sebenza ngo koyika

Akumangalisi ukuba bathetha ukuba akukho nto iyoyikrokra - lobu budenge, kungabi nesibindi, kodwa ukwesaba, kodwa ukuyenza yinyani ngokwenene. Ukuphelisa ngokupheleleyo ukwesaba akunakwenzeka, kuba kunikezelwe yendalo ngokwayo. Uloyiko - lo luhlobo lwenkqubo yokukhusela, eyenzelwe ukuqhubela umntu ngaphandle kweemeko eziyingozi. Ngoko musa ukumisela umgomo wokuphelisa ukwesaba ngokupheleleyo, ungcono ukufunda ukuhlala nabo.

Ukuziva uloyiko luhlala luvavanyo. Ubuthathaka obunomcimbi wesiganeko sijikeleze ngamnye wethu. Ungaziphepheli ngokungadingekile - zifunde ukunqoba, ixesha ngalinye ukulawula iimvakalelo zabo. Yonke inkolelo encinci phezu koyiko lwakho iya kutshabalalisa umlingani wakho kwaye unike isizathu esifanelekileyo sokuzikhukhumeza.

Nika umvuzo kwizemidlalo

Ukuthetha ngendlela yokuthukuthela umlingani womntu, abaninzi banokuthetha ngokukhawuleza imisebenzi yomzimba. Kodwa umdlalo ubalulekile kubhinqa.

Lo mbuzo ubaluleke kakhulu kulabo abangathandi ukuxhoma kwibha okanye ukuphakamisa izisindo. Cinga okukhethwa kukho, khangela into oyithandayo. Mhlawumbi ukhetho lwakho - aluyinto yokuzivocavoca kunye nempilo, kodwa i-motocross okanye ihhashi yokugibela?

Imidlalo igxotha umzimba kunye nomlingiswa. Khumbula: iiklasi kufuneka zibe rhoqo, kwaye isizathu sokunqumla uqeqesho singacingwa ngaphandle kokuba eso sifo. Umntu oqinileyo emoyeni akakwazi ukucacisa ukuba ngumntu ocebileyo kunye nesondlo.

Ungesabi ngamazwi anomusa

Ngaba umntu oqinileyo unokuthi: "Ndiyaxolisa", "ndinetyala," "Ndiphosakele," "Ndiphosakele"? Awucingi ukuba lo ngumqondiso wobuthathaka?

Khumbula: ukunyaniseka, ukungazinzi, ukunyaniseka - ezi zibonakaliso zamandla. Ngokuqhelekileyo, oku kuyimfihlakalo emva kobuthathaka obunzima obufihliweyo.

Iingcali zengqondo zifuna ukuba kunzima ukuchaza la magama kunokukhupha imilambo yokuhlambalaza kunye nokumangalelwa. Qaphela ukuba impazamo inokwenzeka kuphela ngumoya onamandla kunabo bonke abantu. Xelela abathandekayo bakho ngemvakalelo yakho, ungesabi ukuguquka phambi kwabo (kuba sonke asikho isono). Musa ukuyihlazo le nto, musa ukukroba ngamazwi anomnene.