Imithetho Ellen Feyn kunye Sherrie Schneider, "Indlela ukutshata umntu amaphupha akhe"

Sinokutsho ukuba umbuzo njani ukutshata umntu amaphupha akhe, liwuthuthumbisa inkoliso yabantu ababhinqileyo. Akukhathaliseki njani namhlanje ithandwa kubudlelwane evulekileyo, bazishiya indibano nomtshato yoluntu. Enoba lwalunjani, emtshatweni ukuqaphela ubunzulu iinjongo omabini amaqabane kunye nesakhono ukuze athathe uxanduva ubomi babo.

imithetho Ubudlelwane: ngokungazi akukho imiphumela izaba

inkqubela ebonakalayo, ukuququzelela ubomi bethu namhlanje iye emtshatweni yokuzithandela ngokupheleleyo. Ngenxa yokuba ngoku, isigqibo yabazali, okanye yengcinezelo inkcubeko yesizwe, okanye ukukhulelwa akakwazi ngokuzenzekelayo kungakhokelela emtshatweni. Kule nkalo, amadoda afuna ukunxulumanisa nakwizibetho zabo kunye nomfazi ibaluleke isibili.

Noko ke, loo nkululeko, ngathi izinto ezininzi kangaka enomtsalane zitshintshile. Amantombazana amaninzi baziva a wayedideka, neendawo yalahleka ngohlobo izithethe zakwaNtu ukuziphatha kwaye ukungabinako bathembele iingcebiso kunye nokhokelo abameli kwizizukulwana zangaphambili. Kubonakala ukuba yonke into iye yaba lula, kodwa ayikho: yonke into eyahlukileyo. Imithetho yomdlalo ezitshintshiweyo ulwalamano, kwaye kufuneka bazi ukuba ukuze siphumelele, kungekhona iphambana sibukela kubomi.

Omnye ongandiphikisa sikholelwa ukuba ngokwemvelo ekuphuhlisweni kobudlelwane phakathi kwamadoda nabafazi kufuneka kulungiswe, kodwa enyanisweni akunjalo njengenoveli yeholide okumnandi. Apha kwisibonda intsebenziswano ixesha elide, eli gama lihambisana umtshato olukhulu.

Ukuze siqonde uhlobo kweminqweno yabo kunye nemigaqo kwingcingane babantu, amantombazana kunye namabhinqa kufuneka uncedo abacebisi abanamava. Iminyaka engaphezu kwama-20 kulo msebenzi eyenziwa ngempumelelo Ellen Feyn kunye Sherrie Schneider, owabhala incwadi odumileyo "The Imithetho. Indlela ukutshata umntu amaphupha akhe. "

Ukuze umntu ukudala umthetho

Okokuqala, le ncwadi kubalulekile ukufunda amantombazana abafuna ukwenza intsapho. Ngokutsho ababhali, imithetho yabo yenzelwe ukunceda ukwakha ixesha elide, ngokupheleleyo kunye nobudlelwane olomeleleyo. Ukuba madolo malunga neenjongo zalo okanye bakhetha imodeli elula lobudlelwane namadoda, akukho mfuneko yokuba balandele isikhokelo wabeka phantsi.

Imigaqo Ellen Feyn sele ziphuhlisiwe emva kweminyaka yokufunda kunye nohlahlelo ubomi abafazi abaninzi. amanqaku 35, nto leyo ngendlela ecacileyo kakhulu ekuyileni imiyalelo ngenxa yokuziphatha ngamantombazana ziye zavela ngenxa yokuba yonke ingcaciso ayifumene ngexesha ngumbhali yophando.

ukusebenza eliphezulu

Ngaphandle kwento yokuba ncwadi yabhalwa yaza yapapashwa ngowe-1995, ukubaluleka kwayo ayikho lifinyele. Ngaphezu koko, imithetho Ellen Fein ikhangelwe eninzi yabafazi abafunda umsebenzi wakhe. Ukuphonononga baqiqa ngelithi imithetho kusebenza.

Le ncwadi yaguqulelwa iilwimi zasemzini kwaye wamelana inani elikhulu iincwadi. Ukuphonononga ezibhaliweyo kuyo phantse zonke iincwadi ezinkulu American kunye nababhali wamema rhoqo njengondwendwe kwi kwimiboniso eyahlukeneyo kumabonakude.

Ndakuqonda imigaqo nemithetho elawula ubudlelwane phakathi kwamadoda nabafazi, ababhali wanceda abadumileyo ezifana Opra Uinfri, Beyonce, Bleyk Lavli, Keyt Middlton kunye nabanye. Kulo studio, Oprah wayeweva ucaphulo encwadini imithetho kunye Ellen Fein.

Sherri Shnayder kunye asebenza wakhe kabini amenyiweyo le ngcaciso-ntetho TV ethandwayo.

Eyona Isiseko sezi ngcebiso

Ukuba uzama compress intsingiselo yonke le ncwadi isivakalisi esinye, bekuya kuba ngathi iingcebiso besini wamhle: ". Musa ulahlekelwe intloko yakho, fumana amandla akho uze ubonise ukuba le ndoda" Kulo mzekelo, indima isigqibo bobabo ukuba singaweli ubizo ubuthathaka babo kwaye hayi ukuba indoda ibe intombi. Imigaqo Ellen Feyn isekelwe kwinto yokuba amadoda anamandla (ngokwenene ezinjalo ngamadoda best) ukuba abazingeli ngokwemvelo. Conquest na egazini labo, kwaye awunamdla kwemigodi, nto leyo eza phambi kokuba aye afune kuye.

Nganye indima yayo

Incwadi ethi "The Imithetho. Indlela ukutshata umntu amaphupha akhe "inceda abafazi ukuba babe 'amaxhoba ezinqwenelekayo' yaye liququzelele inkqubo 'zokuzingela kulungile." Emva kokuba bonke abantu ofanele ukhethe ngokwabo kuphela abameli kakhulu kwindawo yabo baze benze konke okusemandleni ukuze ukutsala ingqalelo yabo. Inkqubo kokoyisa nokoyisa nemiqobo amadoda kubaluleke kakhulu, ekubeni injongo unika kuqala, ixabiso kunye nentsingiselo. Abasetyhini babe uhlanga bulumko uzokoyikisa amadoda okunokwenzeka ngenxa yokuba isiqalelo ukoyisa angakwazi kubudlelwane okanye ukuzama ukwenza kube lula ukuba abaviwa babo. Le ncwadi "Imithetho" ubhenca oku kunye nezinye iimpazamo ezifanayo ngengqondo ababhinqileyo yaye icebisa amanyathelo eziphathekayo siyiphephe.

imithetho categorical kunye zazingekho

Abanye abafundi baye bakhalaza ukuba imithetho engqongqo kakhulu, yaye unamathele kubo kunzima. Impendulo sebenza ibhunga ukuba iyiqwalasele le eziphambili ukufumana nezizathu. Emva imithetho Ellen Fein zibhalelwe abo bafuna ukutshata. Oku akuthethi isibini leminyaka ukuphilisana kwi izindlu eqhelekileyo.

Sithetha ngentsebenziswano eminyaka. Ukucacisa! On yentsebenziswano yinxalenye: ukuhloniphana, uphuhliso efanayo, intlalo-ntle zemali, ubomi ngokwesondo oluhle, ukuzalwa kunye bekhulisa abantwana nokugcina umdla omnye komnye kwixesha elizayo. Yinto umsebenzi onzima, emva kokuba zonke izakunikezela kwaye uhambe ukuhamba lula kakhulu, kunye nemiphumela emibi ukuziphatha okunjalo baziwa kakuhle ukuba abaninzi.

Indlela ukudala umfanekiso womfazi umdla

Le ncwadi "Imigaqo" ntoni ukubiza ukuba uxoke kwaye uzame ukucinga umntu owahlukileyo, kucetyiswa ukuba uzazi wena, ukuba ukufumana kwanokunikezela zalo eziluncedo ngokufanelekileyo. Indlela ingongoma ephambili enxulumana kukugcina ukungaqondani ethile, ukungazithembi phakathi kwamadoda nabafazi. Uninzi iingcebiso swi indlela ukugcina kakuhle umgama ofunekayo. Umzekelo, umthetho-3 ngokuyintloko afundiswa ukuba bachithe amandla abo abanamdla. Kodwa phantse yeyona eqhelekileyo impazamo abafazi.

Phakathi kwezinye izinto (iimpawu ngcathu ehlekisayo, uburharha elungileyo kunye imbeko aqhelekileyo) cebiso ibalulekileyo ukuze kube lula ukunxibelelana kwaye ube yingxaki abantu. UMthetho 3, kunye nabanye ezibekwe isibheno kwincwadi kwabo abafazi bat kuthathwe inkcazelo iinkathazo kunye neengxaki zabo.

Umbhali iceba ukuthintela unxibelelwano ngomnxeba imizuzu elishumi incoko, ngelixa inani leentlanganiso - kathathu ngeveki.

Zonke ezi nzima kwi iingcebiso uqala ziyilelwe ukwenza umfanekiso we abafundileyo, imicimbi ezixakekileyo rhoqo umdla, esebenzayo, afuna umfazi. Ngokutsho ababhali, ukuba ukulungele gqitha ukubona abafazi babo bathi amadoda yimpumelelo.

Ngaba bukho ubomi emva kokuba betshatile

Ukusebenzisa midlalo kakuhle hola ukufumana ezininzi iileta, Ellen kunye Sherry bakwazi ukuhlalutya isixa omkhulu amabali obomi. le ncwadi yesibini yabhalwa ngenxa yayo, esithi: "Imithetho umfazi ekrelekrele."

Umbhali arhola ingqalelo yokuba abafundi babo ngokusebenzisa indlela echazwe ngaphambili kunye nemigaqo ezibandakanya okanye utshatile. Nangona kunjalo, ngeli xesha, imiba kuba mkhulu. Indlela ukuziphatha umtshakazi nomyeni wakhe? Ngaba kunokwenzeka ukuba nelokuphumla ukunqanda ukubulawa imithetho engqongqo? Njani ukuba ukwenza iimpazamo yaye musa ukuchitha oko sele kwakhiwe?

Ezi nkalo zigutyungelwe kule ncwadi entsha. It yenzelwe ukuba amabhinqa aselula kwaye ijolise nokugcina umdla umfazi ngamnye kwiimeko zatshintsha.