"Ndiyithiyile ngokwam!" Indlela kwakhona ukuthanda wena?

Xa ulwazi lwethu, ezele iimagazini ezenziwe kunye neelebhile zentlalo, kunzima kakhulu ukuba kugcinwe nezengqondo le fomu. Man esemncinane ukuba ukunyanzelisa zonke iintlobo imifanekiso kunye nezimvo, ngaphandle apho womelele abazi ngakumbi, akakwazi ukwenza. Ngenxa yoko, self deformation umntu uqalisa ukuqonda ngokwayo ngokusebenzisa bemilo neemvakalelo ezingakhiyo. indlela wasungula akakwazi ukuyeka, kwaye kukho etshabalalisayo self-intiyo.

"Ndiyithiyile ngokwam!" - amaninzi enjalo ubengamvanga kuphela emlonyeni elivisayo, kodwa umntu omdala, indoda self-ngokwaneleyo. Oku akuthethi ukuzingca okanye umnqweno ukutsalela ingqalelo iingxelo ezinjalo. Le ngxaki uye iingcambu ezinzulu ngokwengqondo.

Ngokufuthi ibinzana elithi "Ndiyithiyile mna kwaye ufuna ukufa 'ukuba endikuvileyo imilebe imbeko, esiPhakathi, omhle, imbaleki lokuqala-class, umphathi engcono njalo njalo. D. Ngokuqhelekileyo, syndrome intiyo kuchaphazela abantu sinotyekelo ukuphelela idealization kwabo. Umzekelo, umfundi kusetyenziswa, ukuba usoloko phambili, ukuba kube kakhulu, ukufunda kunye naluphi na uviwo - akuyongxaki. Kodwa ukuba akhubeke kanye, kanye impazamo - yaye ihlabathi liphela uyachitheka. Masithi i A umfundi na iimviwo ziya kufumana i-avareji yobudala endaweni yesiqhelo ezintlanu - le meko iya kukhokelela yintlekele ngaye. Kunye nesiphelo kuphela kuba eli binzana: "! Ndikuthiyile ngokwam ndingumntu isiphukuphuku" Umfundi ixesha elide ngaphandle kwengoma, kuya kuqalisa ukuba abandakanyeke self-bake. Ngamanye amaxesha, xa umntu akakwazi ngokuzimeleyo ukuphuma komkhusane self-Ndababona abatshinizi, ukuze ukuzibulala.

Ukuze ukuhlala kweli hlabathi ethanda wena kunye nabanye, umele ungaze idealize ngokwabo meko okanye abanye abantu abahlala. Ngapha koko, umntu idealizes ngokwaso, kwi isiliphu encinane uya kuyaphula, kuba kwakuza kufuneka nditshintshe i "wavuka elimbala iiglasi" kwi ezi- yinene. Isizathu sokuba intiyo - umsindo yesiqhelo wayalela zonke; Andiqondi ukuhlangabezana iinjongo zakhe efanayo, ngoko endiyithiyileyo nam.

Ngesiqhelo kuhlaselwa ndikuthiyile umbono buthuntu ngokwakhe. Le ndoda iqala ukuphulukana kwebala kunye ndikhulile, oko ukuntywiliselwa ngokupheleleyo izikhalazo zabo, siyeke aphendule ngokufanelekileyo ukuze amaza ezingqongileyo. Naliphi na ibinzana okanye krwaqu nje kubonakala ngezinyeliso isidima. Iinzame iyinceda ukuba asabele irritably kunye nodlame. Uyakwazi amaninzi uve kuye: "Adede kum! Ndifuna ukuba wedwa! Njengokuba wena ntoni na kum! I hate ngokwam! "Ubomi iqala ukuze babonakale kumzabalazo obungunaphakade nehlabathi ngaphandle. Kodwa enyanisweni kukho usukuzwano, "oku" kunye "self efanelekileyo."

ibali eliqhelekileyo ayikho case mnye apho self-intiyo kumntu ihlabathi ngaphandle, abantu esibathandayo. Kwimeko enjalo, loo mntu waba okhohlakeleyo abahlobo kunye nosapho. Ukukhetha lixhoba, uqala kutshabalalisa umoya wayo. Ngaphezu koko, lo nzima kulimaza nawuphi na umntu omsulwa, kokukhona sifumana inkqubo. Ngale ndlela 'self-niyithiya "yena ngelithi ngokwawo kwaye ngokugudileyo ikratshi labo" self efanelekileyo. "

Ezi mpawu zingentla kunokukhokelela kwintlekele yena nabanye. Ngoko ke, kufuneka ukutshisa ezifanelekileyo wakho uze umthande i "self yokwenene" into oyiyo; bonke nobuthathaka, ukulibaziseka, iimpazamo intetho, umzimba kunye nezinye izinto. Ngapha koko, ubomi unikwa kanye, kwaye kuhle ukuhlala amehlo akho akhangele ukuba ihlabathi esengqiqweni kwaye zahlukene.