Kutheni lilolo ilungile kwimpilo: 5 Izizathu

Kuluntu lwethu, kukho ufune ukuba abantu abangatshatanga va abagxothiweyo ezilusizi. Kodwa zeesayikholojisti kwiYunivesithi California e Santa Barbara Bella Depaulo ngokwesiseko awuvumelani nale ngxelo. Ngokuba buyasuswa ubomi bakhe abadala lonke (kwaye ngoku engama-63 ubudala Bella), akazange engonwabanga, nangona engazange wayetshatile kwaye kungekho bantwana. Kwiminyaka 10, ingcali wanika isifundo inzuzo zengqondo ngokwasemzimbeni ngenxa sodwa. Ngeli xesha, uGqr DePaulo bakwazi ukuhlalutya iziphumo izifundo ezingaphezu kwama-800 lwenzululwazi ngalo mbandela. Funda kutheni nesizungu - kulungile abantu.

inethiwekhi kakhulu olubanzi lwentlalo

Abantu abaninzi ngempazamo abakholelwa ukuba izibini ezitshatileyo kufuneka abahlobo ngaphezulu kunokuba singletons. Noko ke, ngokusekelwe kwedatha yeenkcukacha-manani, uthungelwano branched yentlalo angatshatanga kufuneka nje enye. Le inzuzo yafunyanwa ngo-2015 abaziingcali kwezentlalo Natalie Sarkisyan noNahomi Gerstel, ngubani ndicinge ukuba unxibelelwano indlela ezahlukeneyo phakathi singles abadala American kunye nabantu abatshatileyo. Ngenxa yoko, kuye kwafunyaniswa ukuba eyona nto badla ukunxibelelana nabahlobo babo, izalamane, abamelwane kunye nezihlobo nje. Bazimisele ukubonelela bonke uncedo ukuba amalungu kwinethiwekhi yabo emikhulu kwezentlalo.

Kwelinye icala, xa umntu ongatshatanga kukho naziphi na iingxaki, abantu lowo ndancedwayo ukuba enze indlela yakhe umva inyathelo. Ngamanye amazwi, le single kusenjalo ingqiqo ngamandla engqinibeni, nto leyo eza kunceda ukukhula kwiimeko ezinzima. Exakayo, ukuba lilolo kwandisa inani ubudlelane phakathi amadoda kunye nabafazi, nokuba kwinqanaba yengeniso okanye imvelaphi.

Angathabatheki yemfundo ngokwasemzimbeni

Oku kwaphawula has inyaniso ethile: izibini ezininzi, ukuze baxhase ulwalamano, "luzole 'kwaye akukho kuphinda khangela emva kwabo. Ubuncinane xa kufikwa ukuya ejimini, oko kuyinto ebalulekileyo, ukomeleza impilo, oko kukuphela kuluhlu kuqala. Xa abaphandi wajonga imikhwa yabantu ngaphezu 13.000 kunye namabhinqa abaneminyaka eyi-18 ukuya 64, izazinzulu ziye zafumanisa ukuba zezidanga bachitha iiyure ezininzi ngeveki kwiiklasi ku ejimini. Esinye isifundo umdla lwaqhutywa ngo-2015 e-Europe. Xa abaphandi kuthelekiswa umzimba mass nezalathiso abantu 4,500 abavela kumazwe ezisithoba aseYurophu, kwafunyaniswa ukuba umyinge olulodwa 2.27 eekhilogremu lighter ngaphezu abaphenduli zabo abatshatileyo.

nobuntu

Uhlalutyo idatha iintsapho namakhaya yokufunda yesizwe lwabonisa ukuba abantu ndililolo athambekele ekukhuleni. Phakathi kwabanye, abaphendula wakhetha nkcazelo zilandelayo:

• BuBomi kum - yinkqubo eqhubekayo yokufunda, ukutshintsha, kunye nokukhula umsebenzi.
• Kubalulekile ukuba kusoloko kukho amava amatsha ukuba umngeni kum, mna ithuba ukutshintsha imbono yehlabathi ezingqongileyo.

Ibalula bavumelana nala mazwi, ngoxa abantu abatshatileyo kugqitha kubo.

Emva kokuba umtshato abantu babe ngaphantsi onesisa

Enye uphando ummeli wesizwe kwaqhutywa eUnited States kwizigaba ezimbini: eyokuqala, kwisithuba ukususela 1987 ukuya 1988, uze kwakhona emva kweminyaka emihlanu kamva. Bella Depaulo lacazulula iinkcukacha waza wafumanisa ukuba abaphenduli abatshatileyo bakulungele kangako ukuba ukubolekisa ngemali kubahlobo, xa kuthelekiswa nabo abazange bade Sahlukana inkululeko. Kufanele kuphawulwe ukuba ezi zinto zifunyanisiweyo kusebenza kuphela abantu. Ngenxa yoko, i-avareji elilolo American liboleke abanye abahlobo nezalamane zakhe 1875 zeerandi ngaphezu kokuba umntu otshatileyo. Kodwa kubalulekile ukuba indoda imale nesisa kwakhe kwakhona liphuma phantse kumanani edlulileyo (ngo-1275 zeerandi).

Le ngcali iqukumbela: "Nangona kukho inyaniso yokuba amaqabane atshatileyo, kuba imithombo eziliqela yomvuzo, oko akukho bubonakala nesisa zabo. Ngokwahlukileyo koko, abantu abatshatileyo bakulungele ngaphantsi ukwabelana ubutyebi babo kunye nabahlobo kunye nezalamane zakho. Awukwazi kuthi ngalo wodwa, bethanda ukuba anike imali-mboleko, ukuba umthombo omnye kuphela imali. "

Iinzuzo for Mental Health

Wezengqondo Emmi Morin iyaqinisekisa ukuba ubulolo lineqela izibonelelo zempilo yengqondo. Kwakhona kuya kukunceda ube nemveliso ngakumbi ngumntu ngobuchule. Ingaba unayo ixesha ezisimahla, onokuwatshintsha tirhisa ngokokubona kwayo. Amava abonisa ukuba abantu abaninzi bachitha eli xesha ukuze uzazi bhetele. Ezi ziphumo kuqinisekisa ukuba imigqaliselo zabanye iisayikholojisti ezinxulumana ubulolo kunye abanovakalelo lwenkululeko, ukubaleka, iphefumlelwe. Umzekelo, amagcisa badla umhlala ukwenza wobugcisa yakho elandelayo.